Pointlessness & Dirty Thoughts

It has been pointed out to me by concerned members of my adoring audience that so far this is a rather boring and pointless blog.

Thanks Tara, this is to do with one or more of the following reasons:

1. I am not actually in China yet. Although to the casual observer I may not appear to be totally here either... I swear that I am.

2. My life really isn't interesting enough to write about day to day, I mean who wants to hear the drunken ramblings of another blogging wannabe. Teen angst is over rated.

3. By making you wait for the good stuff I'm building a sense of anticipation and excitement. (I know I am wetting my pants just thinking about all the fun stuff I'm going to be doing)

4. Also I'm actually in the process of hiring a ghost writer soes that I don't actually have to write this. I was planning on hiring Phil but then I realised that his drinking habit might get in the way of his professionalism and on the job work ethic, so I've been down at Wellington Zoo and trying to find a chimpanzee to fill this crucial role. ( I tried a panda but the lack of digits made it hard for them to type, and the cost of stenographers for dictation these days is just ridiculous)

So yes Tara thanks for pointing that out. I wholeheartedly agree with you. This is very boring. (please enjoy these photos I took the other day of me watching some paint dry) But then again we must remember it is about me. I shall endeavor from now on to fill this blog with jovial and entertaining content.

Oh and if you want duty free flick me an email or post a comment (remembering that I do also have a drinking problem and one can only hide so much alcohol in ones blood stream) telling me what you want. Although if its made in China chances are your probably gunna be able to get it at the warehouse.

Sneakers direct from the sweatshop floor anyone?

And another thing that was pointed out to me today by one of my colleagues that China actually censors the internet. Its like China has one giant family filter placed on all ISPs so they cannot provide all that good content that we western, freedom of speech loving democratic capitalist pig dogs take for granted. So its going to be interesting to see if I will actually be able to access this over there. Which would be a tad of a bummer if I couldn't (what after all this excitement and all).

But we shall wait and see.Out